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Epic Movie (2007)

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Epic Movie (2007) 

Release Date: 26 January 2007 (USA)
Quality: DVDRip
Language: English
Runtime: 86 min
Director: Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer
Company: Regency Enterprises, New Regency Pictures, Paul Schiff Productions
Movie Info: IMDb
 Cast: Kal Penn, Adam Campbell, Jennifer Coolidge, Jayma Mays, Faune A. Chambers, Crispin Glover, Tony Cox, Héctor Jiménez, Darrell Hammond, Carmen Electra, Fred Willard
Genre: Adventure | Comedy
Watch: Trailer
Size: 699MB

Plot: Four orphans each receive a Golden Ticket, each via a different film "parody" - Lucy (The Da Vinci Code), Edward (Nacho Libre), Susan (Snakes on a Plane) and Peter (X-Men trilogy). This ticket entitles them to visit the Willy Wonka Chocolate Factory (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory). Willy tells the kids that the secret ingredient in his chocolate is human parts, and he plans to keep the orphans in his factory to use them for his chocolate. He succeeds in getting the ingredients, which includes Lucy's sweet "heart", Edward's "peanuts", Peter's "surprise" tooth and Susan's lemon "head" to the tune of 'Fergalicious'. He then brands Peter's backside and locks the orphans in an old room, where they bemoan the lunacy of their captor. Soon, they hear Willy looking for them, and all rush to find a place to hide. Lucy runs to a room with a wardrobe (The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe) and after a series of items fall on her, including a live woman, she climbs inside to find a snowy forest. When her tongue gets stuck to a pole (A Christmas Story), half-man half-goat Mr. Tumnus arrives to help her.

He welcomes Lucy to "Gnarnia" by showing her around his home (as a "parody" of Cribs) and introducing her to a rapping Kanye West-lookalike brother and several goat-women. When Lucy expresses gratitude to his friendship, he gives her a spy-secured camera, which painfully scans her retina before playing a film that warned her of the grave danger she is in (Mission Impossible III). Back at the Chocolate Factory, Edward follows Lucy through the closet to Gnarnia and is nearly hit by a fast sleigh with a license plate (Tokyo Drift). Onboard is the White Bitch, whom Edward calls "Stifler's Mom..." (American Pie series). She convinces him to trap the other orphans. Eventually everyone makes his or her way to Mr. Tumnus' house, where the orphans discover a clue in a painting of the Last Supper that lead them to learning that they are all related to one another, and that the White Bitch killed their parents. Edward goes to see the White Bitch at her castle and realizes all she cares about are the other orphans. After having his feelings dismissed and realizing he got the wrong tattoo on his back (Get Rich or Die Trying), he realizes that she is evil and refuses to tell her where the other orphans are. Unfortunately, the White Bitch flashes him her chest and a transfixed Edward gives her the information unhesitatingly. A group of cameramen and an Ashton Kutcher-lookalike then appears (Punk'd) to mock him, and Edward is locked in the castle prison.

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